There is nothing significant about today and its just another Saturday, 27th March 2010. Being a weekend, I thought I would cook up one of my favourite dishes. The Butter Chicken Masala. Many of my cooked stuff will put off people so I hope this one does too. You know what I mean?
Firstly, you should find out the origins of Chicken. No chef in the world would ever tell you about how this wonderful creature got created. And so the classic citation - chicken or egg. But I think Chicken is halfway between a Chick and a Hen. Hopefully that sorts it out on the origins and classifications.
To differentiate how this animal looks like against other imposters since some of these imposters are 2 legged too... I have a picture here of the original and the look alikes.
That is how a chicken looks like (usually, atleast in my place).And this is how it could look like elsewhere.
Now, if you belong to those minority sect of people becoming extinct (aka vegetarians), young children and the weak hearted, then dont think I would warn you about the gory details that I will present here.
No I wont ask you politely. Just get outta of here you chicken !!!. I am only going to rip the poor creature into 20 random pieces. Guaranteed to make your heart beat stall like the very chicken we are about to cook.
Cooking time:
As long as you want.
Now to the ingredients -
Yes, you need chicken.
Some more chicken.
And then the other things. I will leave it to you to imagine what the other things could be. May be a goat? or an ant? Wont rule out anything under the sun.
Method:
First dress up the chicken. Dressing up humans and chickens could mean an entirely opposite thing. So dress them up properly, in bright colours. Use a paint brush to brush some marinade stuff over them. And if you want your chicken to be real smooth and creamy, you could use some standard industry grade filler and putty. A smooth waterproof sandpaper can help achieve the curves. And once the chicken's been painted sufficiently enough to put a 20 year old girl's make up to shame, throw it in to a barrel of boiling oil. Ohhh did I say that the chicken had to be alive all this while? If I hadn't then, that would make it gruesome now. Surely?
Now enjoy this cooked up meal. But before I dish it out - I would like to share a trivia from the french history. The great emperor Napolean Bonaparte's favourite dish was chicken and he neither liked his chicken cold nor accepted it to be reheated. It had to be hot and fresh everytime he wanted some. Unlike this recipe that would serve nobody, this is no cooked up story but will serve up somebody for today.
